Tonik my ass!

For anyone who has read this blog with any frequency, you may remember a post a while back in which I talked about what a horrible nightmare I can be to customer service people. I'm either your best friend or your worst enemy. Well, today is an example of the later and Tonik Healthcare is now going to know what it is when I decide to become an unholy terror and rain down upon them my vengeance.

Blue Cross, which I normally think to be a very reputable and easy-to-work with company, in their great wisdom has decided to try to appeal to the hip twenty-something generation (namely: us) by creating Tonik Healthcare. Their website is bright and shiny with pictures of snowboarders and bungee jumpers and the insurance plans have names like Thrill Seeker and Part-Time Daredevil. The plans themselves sound pretty good, they include dental and are pretty affordable. When I got laid off, I looked into the plans because they seemed like they would be less then COBRA. The salesman I talked to assured me that plans can go into effect the next day, or if they need to look into something, they'll let you know within a few days whether or not they will cover you.

Well, that is certainly not what happened for me and this is a copy of the letter I just emailed them:

To Whom it may Concern:

As a corporation that is desperately trying to attract the twenty-something set, I was sorely disappointed at your customer service to someone who is smack dab in the middle of the demographic you are trying to attain. I applied for your health insurance after being assured that I would have an answer quickly. I had recently been laid-off and wanted to avoid expensive COBRA costs and just get individual health insurance until I found a new position. I applied on August 29th, my current health insurance expiring on August 31st.

I was denied coverage, which I'm not debating. Those facts are completely separate. The issues that upset me so much are twofold. One, instead of contacting me through the email address I provided for you to let me know that I was not going to be covered, you sent out a letter, that was obviously not going to reach me until after the intended start date of September 1st. How is that playing to this demographic? Most twenty-something I know check their email a dozen times a day and open their mail maybe twice a week. I provided you an email address for a reason, I wanted a quick response and was assured I would get one by your sales representatives.

Secondly, the woman who answered the phone actually mocked me when I was obviously upset about having to call and find out this information instead of having been contacted by you. She told me that you have millions of customers and that you couldn't contact everyone. Well, I'm sorry to hear that my concerns and obviously my insignificant premiums are not enough to make me an important customer worthy of any type of practical communication. I will be very happy to post on every website that I know of, including my frequented blog, that this is how you will be treated if you are denied Tonik Healthcare. If you are so overwhelmed by your millions of customers, I can only imagine that had I received coverage from you, the customer service would have been more of the same.

I was impressed by your website and the services you were offering, but I am horribly disappointed by how I was treated and what's more, by how obvious it is that you don't actually know what it is that this demographic wants.

Sincerely,

Natalie

Just for the record, nobody mocks me without retribution. And when I called the salesman I had been dealing with and told him of this horrendous treatment, he actually said "I'm sorry to hear that, those people hate their lives." What? Is that an excuse for poor customer service? I seriously think that had this been a face to face encounter she would have stuck out her tongue and sang "na na na boo boo" with her thumbs in her ears. This woman was completely inappropriate. And you know what, if you hate your life darling, do the rest of us a favor and find yourself a whole and crawl in. Don't go answering phones for Tonik.

So here starts my campaign against Tonik Healthcare. If they are really so overwhelmed with their millions of customers, maybe I can do them a favor and help them lose a few.

(by the way, I completely lied about how "frequented" my blog is, but I'm okay with that.)